It’d be nice if it was as simple as “stop doing so much” and “start asking for help more” but I have lived experience totally understand that when you’ve been an overachiever for decades, asking for help can be really friggin’ hard. Why? Because it triggers all sorts of stories about our value, what we bring to the table and much more.

Why is people pleasing bad and where does people pleasing come from? Some incredibly common questions in my community so it was time to dive deep on this incredibly common behavior so we can understand how to shift it.

What good is knowing you’re anxiously attached if you have nothing to do with that information? In this post we’re diving into what triggers anxious attachment and how to heal it. Understanding what our body is doing in moments where we are triggered by anxious attachment is the key to understanding how to shift is so you can more effectively form strong healthy relationships, in dating and beyond.

What good is knowing you’re anxiously attached if you have nothing to do with that information? In this post we’re diving into what is anxious attachment, where anxious attachment comes from and the good side of this often maligned attachment style. There is enormous value (self-awareness, tools and the potential for real healing) in understanding what your attachment style means for you, in your dating life and beyond.

Struggling with the emotional highs and lows of online dating? I have strong opinions on what’s going on in that experience of feeling offended by the likes you’re getting on the apps and wanting to give up. And I want to make it a little easier!

When talking with clients or even just those who comment on my content on social media, there is one phrase or opinion that I probably hear more than anything else. When I ask the question, what do you think you’ll get to feel when you’re in a relationship?

The answer: “to feel safe and loved.”

In my mid-20s, I was deep in overachiever mode and was constantly in pursuit of feeling like I was doing the right thing. I wanted to get the promotion, be a girlboss and make more money. But at the same time, I was also trying to figure out the transition of my friendships from college into adulthood. How to date, when my experience at the time was a lot of lukewarm guys and situationships.

The number one sign that you care too much what other people think is if you spend a ton of time trying to predict what they’re thinking and feeling. In short, trying to read minds. Now before you click away, you might be thinking - “uh, yeah, stating the obvious, if I care what other people think, I spend time trying to figure out what they think.”

And there, my friend, is the issue.

If you hear all this talk about why boundaries are important but want to really understand what it means to set a boundary and what might happen when you start communicating boundaries in your friendships, relationships and work life, this post is for you.

Do you wonder whether journaling can help mental health? This will talk through why it’s so beneficial if you struggle with overthinking, anxiety and people pleasing and detail the actual journal prompts a mindset and confidence coach uses for her own reflection (and why they’ll help you move towards more confidence).

Because we cannot control the entire world around us, in order to be successful (i.e. have the lifestyle, love, income, schedule, etc. that we desire) we have to learn how to work WITH a world that we do not control, not struggle AGAINST it. So how do you get the world do what you want it to do?

Unpacking the common reasons why you might be being overlooked for promotions, dates and generally not getting the attention you desire. If you are tired of being the good girl, helper, dependable one but don’t know what you’re doing wrong to be so invisible to your coworkers and men, read this to figure out how to get people to pay attention to you more.

If you are an overachiever that’s tired of feeling burnt out and exhausted, you need to understand that the way to stop people pleasing and how to find a partner who will carry his half of the bargain is in looking at the danger of overacheiving.

This is a question I ask myself, and often clients, fairly regularly. But before we dive in too deep on it, let's clarify one thing: there's a helpful and unhelpful kind of safe. The helpful kind of safe is more like “supported.”

Some in-depth, honest reflections as I ease back into business as usual after taking a week.

This was something that had been explained to me over and over again but now I was living it in real life. It was my freshman year at Yale University. We were all living in buildings that looked like castles, navigating living away from home for the first time, looking around eagerly at the people who people had said may be “friends you'll have for the rest of your lives.” And all around us hung a question: What made each of us good enough to be accepted here?

24 hours before this photo was taken, I was sobbing in a movie theater. Yeah, it wasn’t cute.

The first date went well. You think you might be able to see something with this guy. And then in advance of the second date, you realize your mind is spinning.

Are you saying to yourself: I'll be so happy once I'm in a relationship, I'll be so proud when I get to lead a project by myself, I'll be so confident when I can afford a better wardrobe, I'll be so calm when I can stop overthinking my texts. If so, you need to read this

When you're in the early stages of dating (we're talking dates 1-5), do you find yourself constantly analyzing the text conversation, thinking in great detail on the right thing to say, how frequently to text, etc.?