Why you should quit being so hard on yourself
There is no end goal here, darling. We're never done.
I know you know this but I catch myself in this so often that I feel like you need a reminder too.
If you're looking at yourself and realizing that you still struggle to voice your feelings when somebody in your life disappoints you…
Or you keep getting ghosted and while you don't let it cause you to absolutely spiral like you used to (because you know it says way more about them), you wonder why you still seem to be getting this behavior in your life…
Or you feel like you finally figured out some of the pieces of your dating life but now when you look at your work, your spotting all the same habits of settling for less, people pleasing and “not enough” thoughts and saying to yourself there's more?
I want you to know that there's nothing wrong with you. You are not failing because you have not fully healed all of these things because nobody has completely healed (or at least no person I have ever come across IRL or anywhere on the internet).
Because in many ways, the process of becoming better versions of ourselves - more open, more patient, more calm, more authentic, more healed - is just LIFE.
There are millions of people on autopilot on this planet who are just staying exactly the way they are, letting the circumstances of their life decide how they feel.
But you my friend, are in the small portion of the world that has taken back control and said that you are deciding the trajectory of your life. You're deciding that who you are today is not the best you can be, the most open, the most authentic.
What's hard about this is when you decide to control the trajectory, you start to take responsibility. This is a great thing but it's also confronting because all the things you used to be able to conveniently ignore about how you were repeating old patterns, blaming other people or undermining yourself. And now that you're back in the drivers seat, well… that shits on you.
But this doesn't mean that you need to be hard on yourself every minute of every day. That doesn't sound super motivating does it?
So can you spend a moment today reflecting on how far you've come? Can you take a pause and look at the ways you've shifted your own trajectory in the last month? 6 months? Year?
There will always be more work to do - that is the path of someone who is committed to being the best version of themselves. But the fact that there's more work doesn't mean you shouldn't be deeply, deeply proud.
Cause I'm proud of you :)
