When do you get to enjoy, friend?

Are you saying to yourself:

• I'll be so happy once I'm in a relationship

• I'll be so proud when I get to lead a project by myself

• I'll be so confident when I can afford a better wardrobe

• I'll be so calm when I can stop overthinking my texts

What you're really saying is:

• I can't be happy until I'm in a relationship

• I can't be proud until I get to lead a project by myself

• I can't be confident until I can afford a better wardrobe

• I can't be calm until I can stop overthinking my texts

I fall prey to this too sometimes. I have some big goals for this business this year. Obviously certain revenue numbers are a big part of my business goals. So when I started texting with one of my little sisters who is currently studying abroad about if it made sense for us to try to do a trip together while it was easy for her to get to other parts of Europe, this stuff came up hard.

“I can't book an overseas trip until I hit my revenue goals! I shouldn't spend the money until I know it's coming in.”

But I took a step back - why do I want to hit the revenue goals to begin with?  1) Because it's a sign that I've been able to help a bunch of women 2) Because I want to pay my bills and have money left over. To do what? Travel. And spend time with my family and friends. Live the life I've always dreamed of (and vision boarded and Pinterested and so on).

These moments are always mind-bending because it feels like a big chicken-or-the-egg dilemma.

If you take every opportunity to buy the dream wardrobe, but don't do the work on confidence, you end up with a full closet, an empty wallet and no more confident than you were.

But if you don't find ways to be happy with yourself and your life while single, then you make it way harder to find a relationship because you're always in that slightly negative, I'm-not-good-enough energy. If I spend too much on travel to create the life I want, I hurt my ability to pay my bills which is part of what would allow me to travel.

You see why this isn't all cut and dry?

But here's what I've learned about these situations. It's not about how much money you spend or the law of attraction, “dress like the job you want so you're in vibration for the thing you want to come to you.” If you can find the nugget of what's in front of you that's the part of your dream life, the really core feeling that you're seeking, and create some of that before all the circumstances align, somehow, often almost magically, the circumstances usually follow.

But it all starts with taking a leap of faith to feel the way you want to feel FIRST and let the circumstances fill in around you. 

Last spring, I faced a similar debate: enjoy the location flexibility this job allows me, even though it's spending a little more than I normally do or make the financially justified decision and stay at home. I booked the trip. On day 2, I signed 2 new clients and hit my highest revenue month to date (at that point).

 If you were wondering, I booked the trip with my sister. As a compromise to my financial goals to the month, we kept our costs as low as possible while still making sure we had a good time. And 24 hours after I bought the plane ticket, a payment came in that put October over the edge to exceed that previous revenue record. 

What are some small ways that you can enjoy today? Feel good about your body today? Feel loved today? Experience your dream life today? 

Enjoying today might be exactly what you need to bring in all of those things you've been waiting for.